'The Party'

Attention all party people, rappers, singers, promos, recruiters, and DJ’s. I will be having the most revolutionary party ever thrown in history. It’s going to be filled with good vibes, nonstop entertainment, and moments that you will remember until you’re back in diapers. This party is going to be legendary.

Everybody that the media follows and lives for is coming through to this joint.  I’m inviting Wu Tang Clan, Flatbush Zombies, Pro Era, TDE, Chris Brown (no Drake), OG Maco, Mermaid Monroe, The Game, J.Cole, and many more. If possible, I would bring Beyoncé and Jay-Z to the party, but I’m not trying to put the state of California on lockdown. Ya feel me?

Wear whatever the hell you have in your wardrobe. New or old, I don’t care. If you got South Pole, wear that shit, if you still got Rocawear? Wear that shit as well. As long as your outfit is clean, as in not wrinkled, and no stains, you will be allowed in the party. I don’t want to hear nobody complaining about how their Balenciaga shoes or red October yeezy sneakers got stepped on. Nobody told you to wear $1000+ sneakers to a HOUSE PARTY. So that being said, wear your reasonably priced sneakers or sandals or whatever, and IRON YOUR CLOTHES.

Topic Sentence: Since we’re in Cali and what not, bring endless amounts of herb and alcohol!!! People who are either drunk, high, or both are type of people you need close by for humorous entertainment.  I got coolers placed all around the house so nobody can ransack my damn fridge and what not. Please do not bring any weapons that could shoot, stab, burn, disintegrate, or zap someone. I do not want to be held accountable just because a retard is trigger happy like SWAT, Racist police officers, and rednecks. Lastly, do not bring no hard narcotics like PCP or Cocaine. I know we’re in Cali, but leave that shit back in Los Angeles. Everybody there is stuck in the 80’s.

Now hear me out, I’m a laid back person and I’m down for anything. You can party as hard as you want, but I don’t you inciting riots or starting brawls. I’m not taking the fall for nobody and I’m damn sure ain’t sticking around when LA Swat rolls up and  start throwing flashbang grenades. I have more than one house in Southern California. Thankfully.

As you can see, my house is a mixture of the Versailles palace in France and Tony Montana’s mansion. There’s two Dj’s present, one inside of the house and outside next to the pool. Don’t worry, it’s protected by non-porous, clear panel. FX lights and glow in the dark bands are all over the place. That’s not the best part. The best part about the party is my speakers. Two 6ft tall towers of premium bass are chillin’ outside while there’s  state-of-the-art sony surround sound speakers keeping the party alive inside. Got my house going up… on a Tuesday-wait.. it’s saturday. No, Friday… Nevermind i’m drunk and high.

So, at this moment, the party just became out of control. To make a long story short: Drake crashed the party, chris brown saw him, and then they started scrappin. OG Maco got drunk and started breaking into people’s homes, screaming, BITCH YOU GUESSED IT. The Game and Mermaid Monroe is knocking boots in my goddamn game room as we speak., the bloods and the crips popped out of no where like ninjas and started stomping out my security guards, and last but not least Lady Gaga crashed the party as well….. RIDING ON A FUCKING SQUID WEARING SRIRACHA SAUCE BOTTLES AND RED OCTOBER NIKES(designed by Kanye West). yo… Please come through now. I’ll give you a dollar… and a lamborghini. :]